Saturday, December 22, 2007

Trench Warefare

so i was doing some thinking.

and i figured it out. :-) i was digging a trench in the back yard. 6 feet deep, i think that's like 14 meters for you guys in the rest of the world.

so there i am digging away with a mini excavator. just going about it. both hands and sometimes my feet playing with the levers. left hand left, then forward... then right hand left then forward then slowly right while back... then more right, left hand going from forward to neutral to back... and up comes a big ole bucket of dirt. then dump it and do it again. then again.

and there i am digging a trench. great fun. great fun. digging. and thinking. and i was thinking about chess. as that was my plan from a few days ago. to think about chess and as always something will come peculating up from the inner dungeons of my brain and give me the answer. and it did. took a little more time than usual. but i think this is a bit bigger question than i usually assign to my sub conscience. so... i guess i am not all that upset at the delay.

if you missed the last post... go read it! just kidding. it said i had to think about how i should best learn how to learn to play chess. well the answer that came up wasn't really the path to getting better. but, the thing that has been bothering me a bit.

that's the tactics thingy. doing the exercises. and figuring out the correct move.

and i suddenly had one of those feelings. about it. and its this:

why does all this great information on how to see a tactical solution not improve my skill a huge amount?

now... i think it HAS for SURE improved me. for sure. i now look for things i never even thought of before doing the CT-ART, and i am only about 1/4 of the way through the first cycle. and i feel a huge increase in skill. but playing on FICS i don't see it every game, just once in a while. which is great i say... but wouldn't it be even better if i was godlike all the time?

and that's what i was thinking while digging a trench.


why... why... why... hmm.... dig... why.... dig dig... drink beer... dig... hmmm... why... hmmm.... AAAHHH-FARKING-HAAA!!!


BECAUSE: the problems that i am trying to solve in CT-ART where played to that point by SOMEBODY ELSE! and then i have to figure out what the tricky part is. BUT!!!! NOT HOW TO GET THERE!

that's it.

that's how to get better.

don't follow in the footsteps of those who created those problems. CREATE THEM MYSELF! create the problems don't solve them.

create the problems don't solve them.

yes. all very good. but how to do that?

THAT IS THE ESSENCE OF MY LEARNING. not how to solve great problem. but to make them.



how very cool this blog thing is for my thinking.

so. as the zen (i like zen) saying goes: dont follow in the footsteps of those ahead of you. SEEK what they SOUGHT.

Friday, December 14, 2007


ok. i have been doing some thinking on getting better at chess. i have never been much of a student. actually i am a pretty bad student. i, hmm... for some reason i feel its somehow cheating to take lessons. i know i learn a lot, but there is something in me that says if i don't figure it out myself then i cant really take it to heart. feeling this way i taught myself to play softball, how to hit the darn thing really far. well. not always but plenty enough. and to hit a golf ball pretty well. also how to build a house, play guitar and bass and hockey. also pretty much taught myself how to write software. which is what i do when i am not building my house.

so... how hard could it be to learn to play chess better?

i have decided to learn how to learn to play chess better.

a while ago i wanted to write a science fiction story, its about 60% done now. but when i started i couldn't figure out where to start. what should i do first? so i asked a friend. she said "start at the beginning." seemed pretty good, and i was off and running on it, off and on of course or it would be done already.

where should i start learning how to learn how to play chess? the blogs i have been reading, and i have read plenty of pages so far have actually helped a lot. its a good set of people out there. :-)

when i was working on the house i had a friend help out for a while. sometimes he did the strangest ( to me ) things. things that seemed kinda weird to me. it brought back memories of myself a few years ago. i was at my wife's parent's house. they had a kids swing in the back yard - one of those metal monsters. the 6 legged thing with the swings and the slide. all from about 1972. and it was rusted all to fark. and they just got some new grand kids and the swing was getting upgraded. so we are sitting there. me, resa and mike who is resa's brother. he works construction. and we are sitting there and wondering how to get the old swing down. its just sitting there looking at us. and we are looking back at it. maybe a hacksaw i said. resa nodded. mike frowned. hmmm... maybe if we cut all the pieces up and then we could toss them into the back of the pickup. hmmm... so mike stands up and walks over to the swing. looks at it. hmmm... and grabs ahold of one of the metal poles and leans all his weight into it and over it goes. the rusty mess just collapses. and i remember thinking - hey you cant do that! you need to take it apart with tools and structure. but he just thought: Farkit. its going over. and it did. what a change this made in me. wow. just knock the farkin thing on its ass. easy. so i ran with this. now we had the 2 foot deep cement blocks to get out of the ground. so i ran the truck over to it and chained them up and yanked them right out. no digging. easy.


must be in some way the same.

i think, i am certain, somewhere in my head is some little guy telling me. not shouting, just a certain know it all kinda condescending voice saying "you will see someday. its there. you can get it."

i believe i am REALLY close to this thing. but i don't know what it is. or. more likely i think, somewhere inside me i do know what it is. and i just have to let myself both believe and trust in that something. i have always picked things up fast. but not chess. as a child i was pretty talented if unschooled.


and i just figured it. or... more likely it was just told to me by that little guy inside me. i have it.

just now. kinda cool :-)



i don't try hard enough at those things i feel i can do naturally. i try hard at hockey because i am big and slow. but i don't try to hard at softball which i am much better at because i am big and somewhat strong. selected effort in those places where i know i need it. less where i don't need it.

ha. wonderful. i knew i was close when i started this, the reason for writing it was i thought it would come out and it did. all very clearly therapeutic. cathartic. cool.

now... whether to upload this. heh. seems like i will be embarrassed to see it up on the page. but what the heck. maybe someone will learn something of themselves from reading this. plus! i think only 3 people have ready any of the others anyway, you guys are pretty cool :-)

i can always delete it later! at least i think.

getting wifed! time for bed.

Saturday, December 8, 2007

1280 trapped in a 1230 body...

i was on-line a few years ago and some guy as black just made like a tent of pawns in the middle of the board. and didnt trade any - just locked up the middle. and then stuffed his king in there and put the horseys and bishops in close too. then sent the wing pawns out to get trouble starting. it was pretty fun playing against him - i think i lost all 4 games this way. so i tried it myself. and it was a blast playing that. i think i did pretty well with it after a while.

anyone ever see this?

Thursday, December 6, 2007

Golfing and Pawns

thanks everyone for saying hello! i need the go, sparf go! cheer at least in my own head now and then for motivation.

just openned up the CT-Art program, and closed it really quick. gads i get some nasty ego shots from that thing...

i think i will spend the evening working on endgames. pawns and such. speaking of pawns, i have another question for you guys. its about the H pawn. i mean, the guy looks like every other pawn out there. but, i like to run him up on the kingside as white - attack the badguys. but lately, i have been feeling some un-ease when i do it. it rarely amounts to much. and it takes about 4 moves to get it up there and then just traded off. it does get the H file open, but... i dont know, just something doesnt feel right about it. i never see any grandmaster games where they do that. its not in ct-art ever as a part of some great set of moves. i kinda feel like, well, you know when you are golfing and you see some newbs playing in front of you or with you. and you get to the green. and they put with one finger pointed down the stick? you know that feeling you get? hmmm... gads.

well, thats the same i have been feeling for myself about this lately. like, the guy playing me is rolling his eyes thinking "crud, what a newb. sending the H pawn like that."

just wondering your opinions on this i guess :-)

i think i am too impatient!

Monday, December 3, 2007

It's always tease, tease, tease...

opponents happy when on my knees...

one game it's white, the next it's black.

so if you want me off your board...

this is what i gotta know:

should i castle fast or should i castle slow?

indecision's bugging me...

i was playing some guy at a tournament lately. and the opening had us trade off queens really fast. and also a minor piece. i watched him castle and since all of the pawns were still on the board, or maybe one was gone i thought maybe it would be better for my king to stay in the middle anyway, i could see it having to be there after another couple of trades anyway. turns out i probably still should have castled. but it just seems that i shouldn't have to after the queens and some minor pieces are off the table. but! here is my question to any of you guys:

when is it safe to not castle?

i would just hate to run the king to the corner - not really wasting a move as the rook is now out - but, i would hate to run him there and then have to spend 3 more moves getting him back out.

any thoughts ?